Moving Right Along...

I think it's time for me to embrace a reality about myself and that is that there will be no "relationship" for a long, long time. Not with anyone. Putting all your eggs into one basket like that is just setting yourself up for the inevitable fall, because another person will always disappoint you no matter what. I'm keeping all my eggs to myself.

There are so many things in my life that need attention. Trying to breathe life into something that's dead is really not something I need to be doing right now. Better that I focus on the rest of my life and not get bogged down by bullshit. With that in mind, I also realize there are things to look forward to, relationships that were put on hold while I experienced this mess.  Hooah will be home from Cuba in a few weeks;  B. will be home from Afghanistan soon. Knowing that was upcoming, what was I thinking? What was I doing? What exactly was I hoping to accomplish? I don't really know. I got knocked off my horse, that's for sure. I didn't expect to, wasn't expecting to feel the way I felt. There is still that fire for him, only now it's anger. The key to putting out that fire for him will be when I can experience indifference.