There is something clearly VERY wrong with me that I cannot get over this man. WTF? We didn't spend that much time together. Why am I so wound around his finger? WTF? He could tell me to do just about anything and I'd do it. Well, I mean, sorta ;)
Something happened on a deeper level. That's all I can say to account for it. When I think about him, I can envision him in my larger life, as part of me, part of everything I do. I can picture us in years to come, still feeling happy together. WTF? Where is this coming from? I have never done that! In fact, I specialize in not looking ahead!!! I've been a "live in the moment" kind of woman over this last year or so. But I'll be doing something mundane, like dishes or something, and all of a sudden an unbidden image pops into my head, of him and me together doing something. I picture him being sick or, god forbid, in a hospital and I can see myself there. I picture myself sick and I can see him there. I picture being old and I see him there. I picture stupid shit, like raking leaves or just laying around watching tv and I see him there. I see him with my kids, I see him in my bed, in my house, in my car. I can picture him in every part of my life now and years from now. WTF? Where is this coming from?????
I must be hallucinating or need medication or something.
What the fuck is WRONG with me??????????????????
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